Coping with kids when you’re sick too
By: sharon
TAGS: cold flu health motherhood
When you’re a parent, it’s inevitable that every now and then you will fall ill. One of the biggest challenges you can face is this: how do you cope with the everyday demands of motherhood when you feel as though you’ve been hit by a truck?
It might be a skull-shattering headache or migraine, or a debilitating flu. Let’s face it; your kids always need you, but there might be times when you simply doubt your ability to keep up with them. And it’s not like you can just take a day off from being a mum!
The most obvious answer to this problem is to simply get on with it, and do what you’ve got to do. The emphasis here on the word GOT. You’re sick. Today is not the day for you to weed the garden, give the house a spring clean or reinvent the wheel. Focus on the tasks that absolutely have to get done, and let everything else go until you are feeling better.
Try to delegate some jobs
Think about the people in your life who are willing and able to help you. Do you have a child old enough to help serve breakfast for the younger kids while you feed the pets? Do you have a partner? Could he/she agree to do the dishes everyday until you’re back on your feet?
Do you or your partner have any relatives who’d be happy to look after your kids for a few hours to let you get some sleep? Even if you only get help with one task in your day, when you’re sick it can make all the difference to how you cope.
There are only two jobs that you need to keep on top of
If you’re able, try to just focus on keeping the dishes washed at least once a day, and a load of laundry done. These are two jobs that are really important to get done even when you’re sick. They are more important if your kids are also sick. When your kids are vomitting, it doesn’t take long to run out of clean clothes, towels, and bed linen. If you can delegate one or both of these jobs out as mentioned above, even better.
The mopping, vacuuming, dusting, ironing and any other jobs can all wait.
Make meals as easy as possible
If your family is anything like mine, when you get flu everyone in your house gets it. When this happens, no one has much interest in food anyway, and we only want rather bland options. Don’t bother with anything elaborate that people may not be able to eat.
If you need takeaway to get you through the day, now is the time to order it. If you have any meals cooked and frozen, use those. It’s also a good habit when you’re feeling well and cooking dinner, to cook double the amount and freeze half for sick days.
If you have a slow cooker, these are great for reducing your workload. You can blindly throw some casserole ingredients into it in the morning, keep it set on low all day long, and by dinner-time your house is filled with the aroma of a comforting meal. It almost feels like cheating. If you have a cold you can make a hot, soothing soup.
Another easy option for dinners for a sick family is ‘breakfast for dinner’. This isn’t great to do all the time, but once in a blue moon it doesn’t hurt to have cereal with fruit, spaghetti or baked beans on toast, or other easy breakfasts for dinner. Our kids love breakfast for dinner from time to time, they think it’s really funny! And if no one feels like eating much of it, you’ve saved your strength.
If you get a chance to rest, take it
Can your partner take up the slack so you can cut a few z’s? Do you have just one child at home who naps in the afternoon? Let everything else slide, and just focus on getting yourself better. If you can get an early night, make sure you do. It will help speed up the healing process.
Keep things simple when entertaining your kids
So, you’ve pared back the housework and meals as far as you can, and now you can just focus on the most important (and demanding) job for the day: looking after your children. Try to slow down and keep things really simple.
I have written in the past about one day when we were all sick, and I had to get the dishes done. I had my eldest daughter home sick in bed, and my two younger kids were getting into mischief. I decided I would get the dishes done no matter what, but I would go about it nice, slow and relaxed. I pulled up a chair for my two younger kids, and let them watch me wash the dishes. We talked about the process, and I let my son have a go at helping.
It really is important to ensure your children aren’t bored and aimless when you’re sick, otherwise they’ll run rampant, and you’ll tear your hair out! If I know I’m too groggy to chase them around the place, I like to grab a pile of books I know they love, and sit down with them, reading book after book. It’s something you can do if you’re exhausted. You know where they are with very little effort. Best of all, it’s an educational experience for them.
My partner, if he’s sick at home alone with the kids, likes to play a computer or x-box game and let the kids watch him. It may not be the world’s most educational activity, but when you’re sick, sometimes the best thing you can do is to know your kids are safe. And they love spending that time with him.
Other activities your children could do that only involve you to sit down are things such as playdough, drawing or jumping on a trampoline with you sitting down watching them.
Let go of the little things
Sometimes when we’re sick, we really don’t think we’re going to get through the day when we have little ones. Now is not the time for perfectionism. If you’re willing to let the less important things slide, and prioritise your tasks to the barest minimum, you can make your day that little bit easier.
What are your coping tips for when you’re sick and you still have a household to run?
sharon
A qualified childcare worker turned stay-at-home mum of three, Sharon is passionate about fostering creativity and self-expression in children. She wants mothers to see themselves as more than the invisible lady that everyone dumps their bags and dirty clothes on. She writes the blog, Hear Mum Roar.
Showing 17 comments
Sharon another good one for the vinegar bottle is fresh lemon grass, it leaves a lovely lemony smell. another great use for lemon grass is to use it in a pot of water on top of a combustion fireplace. Be careful using vinegar on taps as it is acidic and if not washed off after cleaning will eat away at the chrome. :)
Argh! Wrong commenting profile! It's Sharon here lol
That is an excellent suggestion, Bluebell, thank you for sharing:) I find kids seem to enjoy hanging clothes too, don't they?
I've had to do similar with my babies once or twice, you're right, it's a guilty moment, but sometimes you have to do whatever gets you through:)
Of all places to get sick, on a plane would have to be one of the worst ((HUG))
Lol, I know that feeling:)
If there is a family member old enough to pull the washing out of the machine and hang it, take advantage of it. If you can let them peg the small things such as knickers, singlets, socks, small shorts, skirts, trackpants windcheaters, dresses etc. on an airer they may be able to manage if you just wash them. We constantly hang especially underwear, socks and some of the other small items on airers. You can move them according to the weather + paritially fold the airer to carry them inside if it looks like raining or if you want to put them in a safe place to remove, fold and put them away later. You can get then "airing dry", then take them inside to finish drying provided your children are old enough not to "interfere" with them and cause any danger.
I was sick as a dog for a week and my very placid and amiable 5-month old had to amuse herself in her cot or activity centre for a week. I felt soooo guilty for the lack of interaction.
Great tips here, Sharon!
I don't get sick very often (touch wood), but there was a time on a plane flight from Sydney to Perth that I got a gastro bug. I had the 8yo and 6yo with me (3 and 18mths old at the time) and I was throwing up and the 8yo was asking me for stuff...longest 5 hours of my life. Then during the flight, the 6yo started throwing up too. Whaddya know...I suddenly went in to caring mode, and didn't throw up the whole time he was being sick. I felt bad again when my sister met us at the airport. I think not having to be the sole carer again (Hubby had not come with me), I was able to focus on myself again.
However, there have def been times when I've just had to call Hubby home from work and go to bed myself. Rare. But it has happened. It's hard when it does occur.
My No.1 tip, which you've mentioned under delegating, is not to be afraid to ask for help if you need it.
I'm also fortunate that at our school, if I got sick & Hubby was away or something, I could call our Pastoral Care team and they'd be delivering hot dinners to my door and Mums would take turns taking care of my kids for however long I needed it. It's nice to have that support.
Feeling sick and sorry for myself right now. I can appreciate many of the notions put forward here. I just wish someone could come over now and do them for me?
Nicole, exactly: two hours to a sick, busy mum can make a world of difference in how we cope that day. When we lived in Sydney and my partner used to work, we didn't have a car, and all up, that meant the amount of walking to school I did tallied two hours per day! I was very grateful to have a bunch of friends who were able to help take my daughter to school those days I was sick.
Kelly, it's nice when your little ones feel the compassion, isn't it? I remember one time lying on the floor (was very weak) and the kids just piled blanket after blanket on me! I was so content, I stayed there LOL
Great tips Sharon. I find it so hard to be sick as a Mum. We just don't have time! But, alas, we ARE human sometimes. I really like what you have said here as I can see them working on sick Mum days. :(
I find my children are truly compassionate when I'm sick and are happy to help out when they can and pick up the slack. :)
It is certainly hard to take a sick day as a mum! I have a great network of friends and we try and help each other out by looking after each others kids when we aren't well. Even if it is just 2 hours, it can be 2 hours to get some much needed rest.
That's the bottom line isn't it, Lucy? That feeling that we just don't have time to get sick. Definitely agree about the honesty bit.
Touch wood, I don't get sick very often. In my head, if I feel like I am going to get sick, I panic, thinking "But I don't have TIME to be ill"!
I am really honest with the kids and tell them "Mummy is really poorly. Soup and toast for dinner then early bed for us ALL"!
Oh yeah, thank god for wearing them out, huh? LOL
If the sun is shining, we head out into the backyard, yes, even in our pjs. I can sit in the sun (which I always find healing) whilst my toddler wears herself out :)